Long before Amy Poehler claimed the best zinger of the 2013 Golden Globes when she referenced the Zero Dark Thirty/Kathryn Bigelow controversy noting that “when it comes to torture, I trust the lady who was married to James Cameron for three years”, Poehler’s character on the hilarious Parks & Recreation invented a new holiday: Galentine’s Day. As Leslie Knope explained it:
“February 14th, Valentine’s Day, is about romance. But February 13th, Galentine’s Day, is about celebrating lady friends. It’s wonderful and it should be a National Holiday.”
This holiday has been warmly received by many, boasting it’s own Wikipedia entry, a tumblr, and numerous blog posts. And it’s no wonder. Because ever since Sex And The City’s Carrie Bradshaw uttered the famous sentence “Maybe our girlfriends are our soulmates and guys are just people to have fun with” many women have embraced this idea – on February 13th and beyond. And that’s cool. It’s important for us all to celebrate our friendships and not just our romantic relationships because – for men and women alike – our friendships shape who we are as people, and they can define us in important ways.
Now, if you think that I’m taking this opportunity on Valentine’s Day to talk about the magical, My Little Pony-esque, slumber parties and mani/pedi types of friendships between women I’m sorry to disappoint you. Rather, today I’m introducing something decidedly non-Cupid inspired: a short blog series on women’s friendships, and in particular, what happens when these friendships end.
Because if it’s true that as women our female friends are our soul mates, then our breakups with friends (and we’ve all been there) – can be as, or even more devastating than a breakup with a romantic partner. And it’s something we need to talk about, even if we may not want to. So stay tuned, dear readers, for a little thing I like to call “Friend, Interrupted” – a series about how to get over breakups with our closest female friends without Ben & Jerry’s and without losing our faith in the power of friendship.
I’ll be staying tuned for sure 🙂
This is not just a female issue. My friend Ed moved away in the early 80’s. We kept in touch for a short while but in 1983 my letter to him got returned to me. I didn’t know then that I would never hear his voice again or be able to spend all night playing guitar together like we did a lot in 1974 -1977. I found a wonderful woman and was madly in love for about 6 years, but the time Ed and I spent together was cut down dramaticly. I didn’t know then how bad it was to ignore male friendships when a woman comes along.
I got to learn a lot about who I am as a man from my friendship with Ed and Later my friend Paul who had since returned to my life and then passed away a few years ago.
As recent as last night I was thinking about Ed, and where he might be and some of his other friends I knew and they didn’t know where he was either. These thoughts though not obsessed on do return and remind me of the value of the friends I do have today.
awesome T! I’ll try not to disappoint 🙂
Thank you for sharing your story, and for your insightful comments about the importance of friendship for ANY gender. I hope you will continue to read and share your perspectives.
All the best,
looking forward to reading this and sharing it with my teenage daughter!
thanks pokey mama!
I love this post Kaila! It is so true. Can’t wait for the series!
thanks katie!! 🙂
Reblogged this on kailakuban and commented:
Intro to the Friend, Interrupted series